“Good morning students”
Welcome to Creative Writing Ransom Notes 101. My name is Professor Nowheretogo. Just call me professor. You all had to submit a ransom note to qualify for this advance class along with your mental stability report. Most of you failed both.”
“ARE YOU ALL CRAZY, sending me a hand-written ransom notes, you must be, if you’re paying $250.00 to attend my class.”
Student: “But professor most of us didn’t have a computer or typewriter when we took the entrance exam.”
“Aha!, this is where you need to have ingenuity and imagination, he shouted to the mystified class.”
“Number one, never submit a ransom note hand written or on a typewriter with a letter out of kilter.”
“Number two, never send a ransom note to the FBI, CIA, or Scotland Yard, if you don’t want to be caught.”
“Number three, make sure you kidnap your victim before sending out the note.”
“Number four, make sure you know how to accomplish your threat if it will be a cyber-attack.”
“Number five, plan in advance what finger or ear you will send along with your threat and it will arrive safe and sound in a non-descriptive packaging. Make sure all figure prints are removed, except the ones you want to be accused of doing this crime.”
(Ransom Note 102 redirecting the crime to others—blame -blame- blame)
“Number six, we will demonstrate on how to cut out letters from magazines to create another form of creating ransom notes. This must be down in a uniform matter, not just random cuttings. This will take up the balance of the six-week course.”
“Finally, we will discuss what countries that do not extradition laws and their accommodations. And for some stupid reason you get caught, on how to spend the rest of your life in prison and regretting spending the $250.00 to take this stinking course.”
Copyright 2017 Sun City Writers Workshop – Las Vegas, NV.
My little birdy said,
“I highly recommend this course as part of your creative writing curriculum.” Thank you!